The Art of Compromise

The Art of Compromise
Sonya Hamlin

Sonya Hamlin Communications he key to successfully handling a difficult situation is thinking through not only your goals and needs but also the other person's goals and needs. How can both of you come out with some "wins" instead of ending with "I win, you lose"? Helpful...

Begin with a question to engage the other person in arriving at a solution rather than giving the solution yourself.
Example: "We're having a problem getting reports out on time. What's needed to turn this around? Can you help?" Sincerely asked questions help keep situations from becoming accusatory and adversarial.

Use the word "I" instead of "you." "I must not have explained that well," rather than, "You got this all wrong." This helps others save face, which allows them to hear you and change what's wrong.

Look down rather than making eye contact with the other person. Do this when presenting a problem that needs solving. This helps him/her get over his embarrassment and focus on the issue. Avoiding eye contact makes the problem objective, not personal. Resume eye contact after you have outlined the problem.

Edit what you say. Some people give so many details when they talk that the main points get lost. Simply refer to what the other person already knows, then add your point of view about the situation.

Ask another question if the person seems to have stopped listening to what you are saying. The secret to giving and getting information is dialogue, not monologue.